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1 out of 10 Dentists are Unreasonable Naysayers

Using a dependable toothpaste is important to maintaining a healthy, beautiful smile. From products designed for teeth whitening to toothpaste for sensitive teeth, its difficult to know which product is most effective.  We trust and use the toothpaste that we saw from that one commercial during the Superbowl commercial that one year, but what if we have been using the wrong toothpaste all this time?

Commercials always state 9/10 dentists recommend a certain dental hygiene product, but what about that other dentist; is there possibly a better solution?

I have spent years searching out what that one dentist we don’t hear about thinks and more importantly, which toothpaste he/she recommends.

I found one particular dentist that fits the mold, John Matthahew, in Indianapolis, Indiana. For the last 50 years, Dr. Matthahew has given his input in thousands of studios on different types of toothpaste. I had the opportunity to see for myself if this dentist has the answer to the question we are dying to know: what is the perfect toothpaste?

This is what Dr. Matthahew had to say: “I have spent the better part of my life searching for a toothpaste that will keep your teeth eternally beautiful. Thirty years of research has yielded the key to perfect teeth! And now for a limited time only, it’s available to you for the low, low price of only three easy payments of $19.95.”

Dr. Matthahew proceeded to pull out a colorful tube of toothpaste from his drawer that had a label reading “DOCTOR MATT’S MIRACLE TOOTHPASTE.” I bought the toothpaste and thanked Dr. Matthahew for his time.

In the 12 weeks following, I attempted to use this toothpaste. Not only were my teeth absent of the beautiful shine I was promised, but they were somehow getting worse.

I went to my local dentist, John Houser, to ask why this supposed miracle toothpaste wasn’t working. Dr. Houser examined the miracle toothpaste for a moment then quickly sighed and shook his head. “Dr. Matthahew is the cavity and scourge of the dental community. Whenever we try to find a reliable toothpaste, he just sits the corner with his arms crossed and refuses to agree with anything we propose. He is an idiotic contrarian and conman. Look at the ingredients on the toothpaste, it’s literally just snake oil.”

I found what Dr. Houser had to say shocking and I wanted a second opinion. I continued to see eight other dentists to get their take on the matter. They all gave the same story: most store-bought toothpastes work fine and Dr. Matthahew is the worst thing to happen to the Dental Association since the 64 ounce slushie.

By the time I finished this study, it had been two years since I had properly brushed my teeth… and now I wear dentures. But Dr. Matthahew wasn’t all wrong since there is a bright side to all this after all: I no longer have to buy toothpaste!

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